Monday, April 23, 2007

Haven't been blogging for a while, been trying to think hard but find myself still trap inside my little invisible box, he asked me to jump out of the box but i can't... i'm trap... i need a ladder.... where can i find that ladder??? I find myself living in this little box of mine alone.... when can i ever walk into his or other's box...

Came across this article about what real life couples have to say about cross cultural relationship, i couldn't agreed more with their sentiments.

Being in a cross-cultural relationship inevitably adds other facets of complexity, which can be mesmerizing and thrilling, but at the same time frustrating and confusing. Not only do we have to deal with common relationship issues, but also experience miscommunication due to discrepancies in cultural perspectives, behaviors and beliefs.

Due to differences in language usage and expressions, in addition to the innate cultural conduct, greater compromise and understanding is required to maintain a healthy relationship.

The fact that dating, or being married to, someone of another culture inevitably brings out our distinct cultural values and predispositions. Some of these idiosyncrasies are to be appreciated and cherished, while others may act as obstacles which, with appropriate communication and consideration, can ultimately be surmounted. Even so, it is important to bear in mind that for a relationship to flourish, compromise from both sides is required, while at times overwhelming cultural misunderstanding and intolerance may prove to be the Achilles` heel in these relationships.

Fundamentally, it is the trust and openness in communication that crystallizes a relationship and determines how couples get along. Regardless of our cultural backgrounds, a successful relationship is still very much based on the deep-seated love a couple has for each other. Being sensitive to and considerate of a partner's cultural differences is the key to maintaining a healthy and happy relationship.

With the escalating level of cross-cultural interactions in our society and, thus, an ever-increasing number of cross-cultural relationships, it is crucial to go beyond the confinements of stereotyping and intolerance towards a different culture. There is a need to open up our hearts and minds to relish and appreciate, rather than criticize or reject, the differences that exist under a canopy of diverse cultures.

Is relationship a box of jig saw puzzle? Must every couple fit each other like puzzle? There are so many puzzle pieces walking around how to know who is the perfect match? How many pieces do we need to try before finding the correct one? Will it take a lifetime to find? Life is not perfect, must we be persistant to find that missing perfect piece? Can't compromise with what we have? Isn't life being about compromising, sharing and forgiving?

Do we have to follow the crowd, do we have to follow the norm? Do we have to care so much about what our families and friends have to say? Y must we let our environment shape us? Y can't we shape our environment?

Postado Por: hucklebeary às 6:35 PM

Monday, April 09, 2007

Postado Por: hucklebeary às 6:46 PM

Postado Por: hucklebeary às 5:52 PM

Why must there be so much waiting in life? Students waiting for exams result, expectant mothers waiting for her baby to be born, city dwellers waiting for transport to go work or school, patients waiting for their health report....

Maybe its God's way of telling us to take things easy, be patient, take time to appreciate things and people around you before they are gone.... Some wait is only temporary some wait is forever.... Which do you prefer? Temporary wait that yields definite positive or negative results or indefinite wait with indefinite answer..... Maybe short term agony is better than long term agony, perhaps time is the best medicine that can be self prescribed... time will heal..... time will bring with it solutions and answers to problems....

Postado Por: hucklebeary às 4:31 PM

Saturday, April 07, 2007

第一次到四马路观音堂求签, 听说很灵, 很高兴求了只上上签, 心情突然轻松了许多, 感觉很安宁, 好像所有问题已经不是问题了, 心情平静了许多许多。。。顿时间才意识到心灵寄托是很重要
的。。。 它能缓和心情, 让人看到希望。。。可是相反的, 如果抽到的是下下签, 我的心情一定就像世界没日一样,完全没希望了。。。

所以人不能只靠心灵寄托, 它只能给你指引不能给 你解决问题的答案, 到最后还是得自己用心和理智来思考, 才能找出最好的答案。。。 大头大头快想快想。。。。。。

Postado Por: hucklebeary às 6:18 PM

Friday, April 06, 2007

Postado Por: beaNie 豆豆 às 10:21 PM

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

你要我说出我的想法,可是我说不出, 就用写的吧。。。

你说我们一定要笑, 一定要快乐, 可是我很难过, 为何强迫自己快乐。。。我笑不出。。。

有人说幸福是要自己去争取的, 可是我觉得这个机会是对方给的。如果对方选择放弃, 自己无论多努力到最后也是没用地。

你问我离开前男友是对的吗? 我说很幸运没选择他因为一开始就是错. 难到选择你又是个错??? 你说曾经拥有就好, 可是我想选择天长地久, 可以吗?

你说或许10年后我会觉得曾经拥有是正确的选择, 可是也可能成为终身的遗憾。。。

你说不要只是抱着一颗树, 外头还有一大片森林可以挑. 可是人不是应该要忠诚的对一个人吗? 我可以坚守一颗我觉得最宝贵的树吗???

我有一个疑惑,可能是你想寻找更理想的森林吧。。。可是为何没尝试过就要放弃, 没尝试过又怎么能假定我会不快乐, 那可能是我的另一片天空。。。

幸福是自己坚定的, 不是你来断定的。。。

虽然我的华文不佳, 可是我会努力的, 只要有恒心, 铁棒也能磨成针.

Postado Por: hucklebeary às 7:54 PM

Monday, April 02, 2007

Can 2 persons with cultural differences be together happily? Can 2 person with different likes be together happily? Can a gal with a 20 years old thinking and a guy with 40 years old thinking but with physical age difference of only 1 year be happily togehter? Are these compliments or barriers to a relationship??? I think there's ways to overcome if not there won't be any cross cultural marriage... At the end of the day, it depends on whether a couple is willing to work on some solutions......It takes 2 hands to clap......

Came across this peom while surfing the web, quite liked it.... here it goes....

Two Days We Should Not Worry

There are two days in every week, about which we should not worry, two days which should be kept free from fear and apprehension.

One of these days is Yesterday with all its mistakes and cares, its faults and blunders, its aches and pains. Yesterday has passed forever beyond our control. All the money in the world cannot bring back Yesterday.
We cannot undo a single act we performed;we cannot erase a single word we said. Yesterday is gone forever.

The other day we should not worry about is Tomorrow with all its possible adversities, its burdens, its large promise and its poor performance; Tomorrow is also beyond our immediate control. Tomorrow's sun will rise, either in splendor or behind a mask of clouds, but it will rise. Until it does, we have no stake in Tomorrow, for it is yet to be born.

This leaves only one day, Today. Any person can fight the battle of just one day. It is when you and I add the burdens of those two awful eternities Yesterday and Tomorrow that we break down.

It is not the experience of Today that drives a person mad, it is the remorse or bitterness of something which happened Yesterday and the dread of what Tomorrow may bring.

Let us, therefore, Live but one day at a time.

Postado Por: hucklebeary às 11:17 AM

Went to Labrador park and saw my very first Sunset view, it was beautiful yet short... in a few moments the sun is gone... Is beautiful things always shortlived? Went back the second time a week later but it was raining no sun set for me..... Perhaps one shouldn't be greedy to ask for more....

Someone asked me what is happiness to me? hmm, never really thot about it, hmm, guess since i'm a nurse, i think its having a healthy body, to be able to wake up every morning perhaps sometimes afternoon n find myself n my loved ones still around is happiness....

You can say these are my needs, what about my wants? What do i want in life? Hmm, actually i just need a simple life, have enough to eat, enough to spend, actually am very fortunate to be born in this era and country... You may say then don u ever want to stay in big houses, drive big cars, buy luxuries? I feel they are good to have if don have i also won't chase over them. I think at the end of the day do you have time to enjoy these? Do you have time for your loved ones? Can you compare cold plastic cards, brick and mortar, metal moving object to a living person???

What if you managed to satify your wants, then what comes next??? Humans are greedy, they will keeping having wants... then when will your loved ones come into the picture?

Is planning for the future so important? Can't we live 1 day at a time? We don even know when is our time to go...... So y not live each day like there's no tomorrow??? Y be so hard on ourselves n people around us? Y can't 2 person be together happily, why must make things become so complicated......

I don't understand, can some gurus give me some guidance????

Postado Por: hucklebeary às 10:46 AM

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